THE WRONG REASONS

Most people enter into a relationship for the wrong reasons, this is one of the reasons there are break ups here and there, the following are the examples of things that shouldn’t be your reason for entering a relationship.

YOU SHOULDN’T GO INTO A RELATIONSHIP BECAUSE YOU ARE LONELY; this is very common among females. Just because you need a companion doesn’t mean you should start searching for a partner, if you are lonely, get a FRIEND, how would you feel if your partner tells you that I only dated you then because I was lonely, excuse me, your partner is also human and he needs someone, if your main reason for dating a guy/girl is just for him/her to keep you company, then you would expect too much from him or her, any little distance between you two would freak you out, and when your partner has fulfilled his/her purpose, you get tired of him or her, and you dump such a person, because, sooner or later he/she would get boring, and the truth is you never loved him or her, solve your loneliness problem THROUGH A FRIEND, NOT A BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND, from there, you confuse like with love.

YOU SHOULDN’T GO INTO A RELATIONSHIP BECAUSE YOU ARE UNHAPPY; my dear, no one can make you happy except you, I mean true happiness, happiness comes from within, nobody wants to date an emotional wreck, GET OVER YOURSELF, your partner is not supposed to be a comic relieve for you, or a clown, if you are depressed and you enter a relationship to be happy, you would only frustrate your partner, because, he would be the one giving, and you, at the receiving end always, a relationship takes two, it should be mutual,  make yourself happy, your happiness shouldn’t depend on ANYONE. This is one of the reasons why people get obsessed with their partners, and it looks like they can’t do without them when they become an ex.

YOU SHOULDN’T ENTER INTO A RELATIONSHIP BECAUSE YOU DON’T HAVE SELF CONTROL; this is common among guys, the girl thinks she has found the love of her life, and on the other hand, the guy just wants sex. if you have a problem with your sexual issues, it’s best you see a psychologist, your partner is not a prostitute or a gigolo, what you have in mind as the reason for going into a relationship, goes a long way in determining how you would act towards your partner, since love was never intended, you would treat your spouse like a whore or gigolo, in the long run, he or she would discover what’s going on, if your partner can’t offer you anything except sex, who is never there for you emotionally and psychologically, and he is just there when it comes to opening your laps, then you know something is wrong, this is one of  the reasons for infidelity if you have a problem with your sexual issues, honestly, your partner alone might not be able to solve it, except he/she is fully aware of such a problem,. And until you learn to solve the problem yourself, you might never be a faithful partner, this happens in marriages to, there are instances where the wife says her husband treats her like a whore in bed, even during sex, love and care should be present, ITS NOT ALL ABOUT YOU, AND YOU, AND YOU AND YOU!!!

YOU SHOULDN’T GO INTO A RELATIONSHIP BECAUSE OF WHAT YOU WOULD GAIN; this is common among girls, the earlier you know that a relationship is not a business venture, the better for you. Financially, your partner can support you, and that’s if he or she wants to, and no matter how small, APPRECIATE IT!!, THE BITTER TRUTH IS, HE IS NOT YET YOUR HUSBAND! , even husbands don’t cater for all the financial needs of their wives, so why would you enter a relationship because of what you would get, excuse me, if you need money, START SAVING!!!!!, YOUR PARTNER IS NOT A BANK. And who says this is one sided, if you can expect so much from a guy,. What’s stopping you from giving him so much too. Well, I support the fact that, some ladies would say, I can’t date a stingy guy, sure, a guy must know his responsibility, it’s even in the bible, BUT AS A LADY, BE AN HELPER, NOT A LUGGAGE, IT WOULD GO A LONG WAY IN EARNING RESPECT!!!!

DON’T DATE BASED ON LOOKS: This is common in both male and female, nobody wants an ugly person for a partner, some even choose their friends based on looks, what comes to my mind is, ‘then who would date the ugly ones’, because personally, am not an exception, “ who no like good thing ooo” lol, the truth is everyone is beautiful, just in different ways, and as the saying goes, “ beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder” what I consider as beauty might be a pointed nose, yours might be because of the straight legs, to mention a few, but my point is, this should not be a major criteria, like I tell people, if you are looking for the most beautiful girl in Lagos, you would never find, not to talk of the world, this is because beauty is endless, even the so called miss world, there is a village girl who is finer than she is, if you see an handsome guy or pretty lady this minute, just turn around, you would see a more beautiful one, if you are looking for the most beautiful, you might as well remain single for the rest of your life, another thing, beauty is deceptive, it covers so many bad features, and because of your “BEAUTY ULTIMATE SEARCH”, you have lost a jewel, if y6ou are truly looking for a good woman or man, beauty should not be the main thing, beauty is just a plus, after all it would fade one day, even chocolates have expiry dates.

All what am trying to bring out is, LOVE  is the utmost thing in a relationship, your partner should make you happy, it is quite different from you dating him/her to make you happy, your partner should be there emotionally, that doesn’t make them your ‘ sex slave’, you should gain from your spouse emotionally, psychologically, spiritually, it’s not just financially, your partner should add to you,  beauty is deceptive, there is one other thing I forgot to add, don’t go into a relationship to get over your ex, your partner didn’t know what happened between you and you ex, he/she shouldn’t pay for your past mistakes and pain. Get over your ex before entering a new relationship. Finally, LOVE SHOULD BE BASED ON NOTHING, SO THAT NOTHING CAN BREAK IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!